PTSD
by princechonomelon
Summary: Phil has PTSD. He can't help but have nightmares every single night. Day after Day. But when Dan becomes Diagnosed with an illness, How will they cope?
1. Chapter 1 - The Nightmare

The trashing sounds of thunder and lightning echoed out of a certain london street, where 2 youtubers lived. The streets were empty with theglossing of the raindrops littered on the ground. Everyone was silently asleep.

Or were they?

 _It happens every night_

 _I watch my world ignite_

 _Like there's no waking from this nightmare!_

Phil started to trash under his bedsheets, gripping onto anything he could find and he threw it across the room. He was having a panic attack.

Phil has PTSD. It wasn't by accident, it was deliberate. Phil had nothing to do with it. In fact, Phil was the victim.

Such acts of violence caused him to act this way every night. He explains to his therpaist that 'They' are out to get him. Every night.

Dan's restless. He is the only one who can calm him down when he's in such trauma.

 _The stage is always set_

 _The place I can't forget_

 _The hidden eyes, that I can feel there_

It started off as something small, just a little bit of shoving and pushing in the corridors. But Phil couldn't forget what happened on that night, the place of where it was not the people who were the suspects.

 _But he didn't tell anyone._

Dan was his only friend back then, though he was not always there as he was in and out, skyving off and never coming in on time; But Phil was always the teachers pet. Never got into trouble or anything.

That's when it all started.

 _My eyes are open wide_

 _I'm racing to his side_

 _There's nothing that I won't do for him_

Dan awoke with a sense of fear as he threw his covers off his body and scrambled into Phil's room, quickly dodging all the things that Phil was threw at the wall. Dan raced to Phil's side in panic, as Phil was still trashing around. This is when it starts to go haywire. Phil starts to scream and yell.

"No! Go Away!" He screamed, covering his face with his hands and flinched as if he was bracing for impact. Dan climbed on Phil's bed and Hugged Phil tightly before Phil started to scream again.

 _But this is not a dream_

 _My mind repeats the scene_

 _I can't forget it and it's torture_

"Let Me Go!" He shouted, Trying to squirm out of Dan's grasp. Dan's eyes started to tear up. He couldn't bare to see his boyfriend in pain and as if he was feeling threat in Dan's presence. Tears started to roll down his face as he quickly rubbed circles in Phil's back, With Phil relaxing at his touch.

Phil started to sob, his grsp moving from the bedsheets to Dan's top; gripping on tightly as if it would be the end of the world to let go.

"Shh…" Dan whispered, His hand still moving in circles. Phil loosened his grip on Dan's top at the sound of his voice, his voice also calming his heartbeat.

"It's ok… Shhh… Philly… You're safe…" He whispered, Carresing his fingertips trough Phil's fine black hair.

The room fell silent, as all that was left to hear was Phil's slow and retched breathing, him hiccuping every one in a while.

The thunder started to move away from the street, and Phil started to calm down even more.

Dan slowly stroked the side of Phil's jaw, getting into a more comfortable position so he could have Phil on his lap. The sheets were covered in sweat and tears, and the walls were cracked from the things thrown. Phil slowly started to look up at Dan, His blue pools starting to regain their colour, as they would normally go grey. His red stained eyes stood out from his pale complexion, as he rubbed his eyes.

"You ok?" asked Dan, his curls flowling over his hazelnut brown eyes. Phil smiled slowly and looked up into his eyes, before removing the curls from his other eye.

"I'm so much better with you, Dan..." he yawned, Stretching his arms. Dan thought for a moment.

 _'Maybe Phil should see his therapist tomorrow…'_ He thought, his eyes diverting to the window. Phil gave a confused look before raising an eyebrow.

"Dan?" he asked, before he suddenly clicked back into reality. Dan gave Phil a slow yet loving Kiss on The direct Lips of the raven haired man, his fingers intertwining with Phil's.

 _That was before_

 _But not anymore_

 _I've left it behind_

 _As much as it lost_

 _Once I'm across I'll find_

Dan parted his lips, and looking down on Phil. He was the luckiest man in the world. He slowly pulled Phil onto his lap; and He slowly placed his hands around Phil's waist, after releasing his fingers from the tangle. He took slow stides, being careful not to Startle Phil back into his attack.

"Phil?" Dan asked, planting a kiss on the other man's forehead. Phil smiled and looked up.

"Yeah, Dan?" Phil asked, messing around with Dan's curls. Dan's hand brought Phil a little closer to Dan's chest.

"Maybe… You should see Dr Shaw tomorrow." Dan suggested, Phil looked confused; before he realised what for. Phil nodded in reply before his eyes began to shut.

Dan decided that he couldn't just leave his boyfriend on his own in risk of having another attack, so he lay Phil down, before lying down beside him and bringing Phil's hips towards is front; his arms wrapping around his tiny waist.

"I'm staying with you, Phil." Dan whispered, Kisisng the back of Phil's neck. Phil let out a satisfactory smile before snuggling backwards into Dan.

"Dan, I love you." he whispered, His head slowly resting on the pillow. Dan smiled as he adored his amazing Boyfriend. And it would not take any decision effort...

"I love you too."

 _I'v_ _e found strength to grow to so much more_

 _A whisper to a roar_

 _No more crying_

I _t's time for Me,_

 _to,_

 _soar._


	2. AN: Slow Updates

**_Helloooooo readers!_ How are you? Life good up to now? I'll give two responses:**

 **Good: 'Awh Yeah! Good on you!'**

 **Bad: 'Awh, I'm sorry. You can talk to Me anytime.'**

 **So yea, I do realize I've not been updating much, but I will, I'm just studying for GCSE's but I'll try to update them all as soon as possible. I'm just letting you know that these fan-fictions are still in my mind but I just haven't got time to writing them yet. I'm also working currently on a few chapters and I may start new stories of what i think people may like more than what I don't like or do etc.**

 **I do hope you understand why I may not be updating as much but these are still in progress, maybe a few will be on hold. Bare that in mind.**

 **I love you all!**

 **\- Cody :)**


	3. Long time no see

Wow.

All I can say is that it's been a long time since I checked in here.

A lot of things have changed since then.

I am a boy and I have finished high school.

I'm Abrosexual and i still love the fandom i write about.

...

All i can say, is that I'm sorry for not updating. It's been a long time.

A long , long time.

Maybe I'll update soon.

The prince


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